Saturday, 13 September 2025

How is South Borsetshire's Labour MP coping?

It has been a puzzle to me why Labour MPs should bring down their own government.  Changing leader is another matter, although defenestration is far more common in the Conservative Party.

I have decided to use a fictitious composite 2024 intake Labour MP as a benchmark.   Here is the first instalment.

Guy Bland didn’t really expect to become a Labour MP or at least that was not his career strategy.  As the public affairs ‘guy’ for a medium-sized charity he thought that doing well in an unwinnable constituency would give him brownie points with an incoming Labour Government.   He might then be hired by a bigger charity or even a lobbying firm.  He and his wife, Emma Bland, who worked in religious affairs for the BBC, could then afford to start a family in London.

South Borsetshire constituency included the cathedral city of Felpersham, the market town and county town of Borchester and a number of villages such as Ambridge.   The sitting MP, Hazel Woolley, a hotelier by trade, had a majority of over 12,000.   However, her hard line Brexiteer and generally right wing stance was not particularly popular locally.   Her comment that farmers should get out from under the comfort blanket of EU subsidy payments did not go down too well..

Her main challenger appeared to be the Liberal Democrat leader on the county council, Mark Grundy.   A keen sportsman in his day he had played for both Felpersham City football team and the Borsetshire minor counties cricket team.  His slogan was ‘Mark My Words: Borsetshire born and bred.’

The Green candidate, Marjorie Antrobus, ran a local animal rescue centre that looked after all sorts of animals, but was out of favour with local cat ladies who accused her of being ‘Doggist’.   (I have heard such a charge in real life at a cats event).

Guy visited the constituency most weekends, although the predominant ly left wing constituency party gave him little encouragement, seeing him as a New Labour re-tread.    His wife was a communicant Anglican so each Sunday he accompanied her to one of the local churches.

The campaign had just started when he became aware that he might have a chance of doing better than coming a good second or third.   He had emerged from a church in Borchester after morning service when two elderly ladies strode towards him.   He feared he was about to be upbraided, but instead one of them said: ‘My sister and I have never voted Labour in our lives, but we are sick to death of this Government and we can see that you and your wife are decent Christian people.’

He had made no plans to buy a local base or establish a constituency office, but the result confirmed his concerns:

Bland, Guy Joshua (Labour and Co-op)                     19,327

Grundy, Mark (Liberal Democrat)                              15,484

Woolley, Hazel (Conservative)                                    11,225

Antrobus, Marjorie   (Green)                                         2.026

Nelson, Horatio (True Patriot)                                          517

How have things worked out for Guy?

After the count, Emma said to him ‘You will never get re-elected, however hard you work.’   Nevertheless, Guy was able to rent a spare flat from the cathedral and set up a constituency office.  He and Emma had a child.  

His first challenge was the Labour plans on inheritance tax for farmers.   He decided the best way to proceed was to work with other rural Labour MPs to get implementation delayed and modified.  Eventually the NFU realised that this was likely to have more effect than parading shiny tractors and combines in London.   Making concessions would be seen as another sign of Government weakness and the Treasury was firmly behind the proposals, but the arrival of yet another Defra secretary of state offered a glimmer of hope.

His next challenge was to find some way of defending Keir Starmer against charges of poor judgment.  He decided to keep a low profile, focusing on the summer fetes circuit.   However, his local party was firmly behind the Andy Burnham stalking horse candidate for deputy leader and this offered a new source of tension with local activists.


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